Carli Lloyd details rift with family in new book

The Equalizer Staff September 21, 2016 46
Carli Lloyd writes in her new book that her soccer career has come at the cost of her relationship with her family. (Photo Copyright Erica McCaulley for The Equalizer)

Carli Lloyd writes in her new book that her soccer career has come at the cost of her relationship with her family. (Photo Copyright Erica McCaulley for The Equalizer)

Carli Lloyd details in her new autobiography that her pursuit of greatness in soccer came at the expense of her relationship with her family.

Lloyd, the reigning FIFA Women’s World Player of the Year and, notes in an excerpt released on Wednesday that long-running tension between her and her parents escalated in 2008 to the point that she abruptly moved out of her parents’ house in Delran, N.J., following an argument.

She details the argument she had with her father over the phone one night in the buildup to the Beijing Olympics:

One night when I am out, I call home and my father answers. He starts right in on me. I don’t want to hear it.

“You never want to hear it,” he says. “Why don’t you get your stuff out of the house or I will throw it out the window?” I can’t believe it has reached this point. But true to stubborn form, I don’t back down.

“If that’s how you want it, fine,” I say. …

I drive over to the house, pull up in front and take a breath. I look at the side yard—my original home field. Being nostalgic is not my natural inclination, but it’s inevitable given the circumstances.

I walk in the house and head straight upstairs. This is the saddest day of my life. I begin packing up all my belongings. My mother and sister come into my room and we all start crying. I am overwhelmed. I can’t even believe this is happening.

Lloyd’s resume includes scoring game-winning goals in the gold-medal games at the 2008 Beijing Olympics and the 2012 London Olympics. She scored a hat trick in the U.S.’ 5-2 win over Japan last year in the World Cup final.

[MORE: In memoir, Wambach admits to alcohol, prescription drug addictions]

Lloyd has long credited her successes to her longtime trainer, James Galanis. It was her parents who suggested to the then 21-year-old Lloyd, who was just cut from the U.S. U-21 team, that she contact Galanis for help training. But Lloyd notes in the book that in the aftermath of the U.S.’ 2007 World Cup fiasco, “My parents believe James is coming between us and they hold him responsible for my becoming an outcast in the mess that came out of World Cup 2007.” That becomes a source of tension between Lloyd and her family, which remains at a distance.

When my father had open-heart surgery, nobody told me until well afterward. When my sister got married, I was not invited. I love my family and would like nothing more than to reconcile with them. Nobody has done more for me than my parents, who devoted untold amounts of time and money that allowed me to play the game I love. It’s no exaggeration to say I never would have gotten anywhere near a World Cup, an Olympics or even the U.S. national team without them. I have never forgotten that, and I never will.

I have missed sharing all these things with them, but I hope that will one day change.

Lloyd has spoken frequently in the past about keeping family members from watching her World Cup or Olympic matches in person, in order to avoid distractions.

Lloyd’s book, titled, “When Nobody Was Watching: My Hard-Fought Journey to the Top of the Soccer World,” goes on sale on Monday. It is co-written by longtime journalist Wayne Coffey.

  • anony

    I never much cared for Lloyd until I read how loyal she was to hope in 2007 in Hope’s book. Changed my opinion for the better.

    • Chak Khan

      They are still friends I believe. They both share common personalities: stubbornness, determine, highly competitive, intensity, and passion for the game. Those are traits that drive them to be great players. Same traits that isolate them from the rest. Cannot please everyone.

      • Steglitz49

        Those traits describe any top athlete. What makes some athletes loved by the people is a different kettle of fish.

        You can run down any list of contemporary players in any sport and find one who is respected and another who is loved. You need that extra spark, that extra piece of goodness if you like, to join the true elite.

        • Chak Khan

          Lloyd has a little more of that spark than Hope.

          • Steglitz49

            I don’t follow you. I presume you are just considering soccer and from only one or two angles. Or, do you mean all sports?

  • mockmook

    Because I have a social conscience and I am very brave, I have decided that I must post this comment on every article at the EQ. I am following in the footsteps of that great paragon of civil disobedience, Megan Rapinoe — therefore, no one who values free speech can possibly object to me commenting here, regardless how “off-topic” I am — it is my right and my duty. Now, my comment:

    Abortion is murder. It injures the souls of those who carry it out and those who have the procedure.

    And, the worst part is, this procedure is causing a virtual genocide against the black race — approximately 45% of all black pregnancies are aborted (three times worse than the rate among whites).

    Talk about injustice!!!

    I look forward to the incredibly productive conversation that this will generate.

    I’ll leave you with this beautiful musical celebration of babies by an artist who has unassailable PC credibility, I’m all-in on inclusion — heck, she has even slept with other women — take it away, Sinead:

    • CED

      Go somewhere else to post your spam rightwing republican crap.

      • Chak Khan

        His/her account is not hacked?

    • Gary Diver

      Grow Up: the World Doesn’t Center Around You

      “I am following in the footsteps of that great paragon of civil disobedience, Megan Rapinoe – therefore, no one who values free speech can possibly object to me commenting here.”

      You have turned an issue of free speech into an issue of hypocrisy. And what we despise is your hypocrisy. You strongly oppose what Rapinoe is doing so your response is to annoy all the rest of us on EQ. Your inflated sense of your importance is truly impressive. Rapinoe’s story is a EQ story, your story is that you are turning into a spammer. I have never blocked anybody from EQ, but you’re acting like a petulant 12-year old and is testing my patience.

      • mockmook

        Gary Diver:

        “Just because one disagrees with the nature of the protest, one should not attempt to prohibit the protest.”

        “The idea that only views one agrees with should be heard in public is a detriment to the future of any vibrant democracy where all people are valued and respected and treated equally.”

        “Not only are protests part of the history of making this a better country, they are still needed to make it a better country in the future.”


        • Gary Diver

          I don’t understand why you are trying to be cute, but given the additional recent killings of black men by policeman you are grossly insensitive to the terrible situation the country is facing now.

          • mockmook

            How is pointing out your hypocrisy “being cute”?

            And, you realize there are multiple problems in this country, right?

            Where are the protests over Islamic terrorists blowing up bombs? Etc.

            Speaking of which, should the policeman in Minnesota have holstered his weapon and let the terrorist go on stabbing and killing people so that the policeman wouldn’t be accused of racism by people like you?

          • goodbye

            My god man you are a moron. I appreciate people with different views than me but only when they can put together coherent, logical arguments. Please stop posting, you are hurting my brain.

          • Arcie Tillydee

            FFS, just block that reactionary, trolling twit.

          • rkmid71

            Have you studied actual data about police shootings and race? Do you think proactive policing has saved black lives from urban gun violence? The one thing we can agree on is that it’s a terrible situation.

      • mockmook

        BTW, you really are much denser than I thought — anyone with half a brain cell could “hear” the sarcasm coursing through much of my “protest”.

      • JL

        Yeah, I’m quickly reaching my limit with this jerkface as well.

    • Lorehead

      I said my piece on this in another thread yesterday. You kind of had a legitimate point the first time—everyone should emphasize with the people who disagree with their politics and consider how a protest will look to them—but the joke is both hypocritical and worn-out.

      • mockmook

        Your soulless commentary is worn out as well.

  • Jack

    What makes these people think I have nothing better to do with my hard earned money then spend it on their books about their screwed up life, relations, etc. So Lloyd, Wambach, Solo, et al good bye – go peddle your garbage someplace else!

    • guest

      Perhaps the word you are missing is gullible?

    • Guest

      Maybe you are not the only person they are thinking about

    • Chak Khan

      What makes you think they are forcing you to buy their books?!!

      • Steglitz49

        11 hours later s/he wakes up … better late than never, i presume

    • Chak Khan

      “PELE: Birth of A Legend”. It aint’ free, so don’t spend your hard earned money on it.

      • Steglitz49

        I do not know if Johan Cruyff wrote a book — maybe it was in double-Dutch — but I daresay there are several items on youtube and elsewwhere to watch.

  • mskillens

    Abby drank and smoked, Hope punched out her sister and brother, and now Lloyd has daddy issues. When Lifetime airs “USWNT: Addict, Abuser, and Homeless, who should play these drama queens?

    • guest

      It’s so delightful when people belittle the complicated lives of other people. Yes, “drama queens,” that’s what they are. I suppose your life is nice and tidy and you get along with everyone and have never stuck a toe across any line.

      • guest

        it’s just funny the usmnt doesn’t have half the drama queens that the uswnt has or the negative publicity.

        • #1Fan

          I sense sarcasm – of course they do, but what they dont have is any relative publicity. In womens sports in the USA what is bigger than the WNT from a visibility perspective

    • Chak Khan

      It simply goes to show athletes are not super heroes; FLAWED HUMANS. Being humans are more difficult than being athletes. Thanks to the judgmental fellow beings.

      • Steglitz49

        It would appear to be the case that most athletes are well adjusted human beings in harmony with themselves. They are liked by their competitors and loved by family, friends, fans and spectators alike. When they leave sport, they get on with the next phases of their lives.

        There are exceptions, of course.

        • Chak Khan

          THOSE are the exceptions.

          • Steglitz49

            I contend that the rotten eggs are the exceptions.

            I put it to you, that because the rotten eggs conform to your prejudice and stereotype, you remember those, and overlook the great mass.

            Some of these flawed characters are not as flawed as media make them out to be. They prove this by their actions when the chips are down. By their fruit ye shall know them.

          • Timber Dave

            I sure as heck don’t “love and respect” Kobe Bryant, nor the behavior he exhibited for years. And my reading is that Wambach is still in the “beloved” category in the U.S., despite her recently-revealed flaws, because of all she did for the USWNT.

            I’m sure there are Internet trolls out there who have said very nasty things about her, but that’s true of pretty much anyone in the limelight.

    • smallchief

      The purpose of writing a book is to make money… you have to include some juicy bits. Wait till Solo’s book comes out!

      • Steglitz49

        Kristi Yamaguchi wrote childrean’s books. the first one — “Think Big, Little Pig” — is jolly charming. Alex Morgan took the same road (may even have predated Kristi) and wrote books about a teenage girl and her chums and their soccer team.

        I wonder what sort of books Buchanan and Groom will write?

  • mskillens

    What’s next? Tobin Heath releasing a 200 page book praising Jesus?

    • guest

      we all know megan rapinoe’s book is coming next. everyone else will have to wait in line.

    • Chak Khan

      Why not? Would you rather she kneel praying during the anthem, i.e. Tebow?

      • Steglitz49

        Matthew 6:5-6

    • HOFCToDi

  • FlyingSquirrel42

    Is Alex Morgan the only other recent USWNT player to have published a memoir or personal story of some sort? I haven’t read more than a few pages of hers, but I’m guessing it isn’t quite the “warts and all” approach taken by Solo, Wambach, and apparently now Lloyd as well.

    Though perhaps she also just doesn’t have as much laundry to air, in that she hasn’t been around as long and doesn’t tend to attract much controversy beyond “is she overhyped or is she Really That Good.”

    • Steglitz49

      Body paint and marriage works wonders. Following in ARod’s footsteps is an obvious next gambit.

  • sudeep das

    Carli Lloyd missed the chance to write her own history at 83:38 mark against Sweden. A fantastic run by Crystal Dunn set her up for the finish. With Hedvig Lindahl out of position the Lloyd of 5th of July 2015 would have curved the ball past a lone defender into the net at far post.

    • Steglitz49

      I don’t even remember that one.

      The only it about Carli that sticks in my mind is that a proper ref would have booked her early in the game and then been forced to send her off thecause of a 2nd yellow card. As it was she was eventually booked in the 110th minute, about 90-100 min too late.